Don't Listen To First Time Smoker's Experiences

Let's be honest and real for once.

Weed is not nearly half as bad as people make it out to be.
Especially if you consider how devilishly bad that alcohol - The 2nd World-Runner - clearly is and how (comparatively) little people complain about its negative effects.

I was unfortunate enough to read an anti-cannabis article in one of the lying newspapers. Basically, it stated that weed was 'the worst thing ever' and is to be feared (no pun ISIS), even quoting an experience-log account as gospel undeniable proof of its fearsome nature from an old-'white' known-bigot - John Snow (maybe) - who claims that, after he smoked a spliff of high dro for the first time, he 'lost all sense of self', nearly died of a heart attack fearing for his life and 'was dazed for four hours' incapable of functioning. 

One: doesn't that sound just like how being very drunk feels?... Two: He is a first timer...